Monday, April 25, 2011


About a year ago, just as a busy wedding season was about to get underway, Steve told me a story about going to a wedding during college, his first time seeing some people from high school, and talking to a girl, trying to impress her... and seeing, out of the corner of his eye, his uncle (I think) talking to the wedding DJ.

Steve: When I was a kid I used to jump around and do a Mick Jagger impression for my family. Just the lip thing and the strut. I didn't even do the voice. And my uncle must have decided that this would be a great thing for me to do now. And the DJ announces that we have a special treat, MICK JAGGER is here. And I had no choice but to do it. And afterward the girl I was talking to was like, "Is this something that you do?"

The painfully awkward story made me laugh pretty hard, and, of course, my first thought was, "we have to trick Steve into doing it at our wedding."

So, Sarah and I came up with the plan to have our MC, Hansen, announce something like, "Steve has a Mick Jagger impression that he likes to do at wedding receptions. He's requested to do it now, in honor of Arnie and Sarah's union, and they would love to see it." Specifically worded to really trap him into doing it.

Like many of our "funny" wedding ideas, we decided not to bother. Probably for the best.

Me: What would you have done?
Steve: Man. I really don't know what I would have done. All I know for sure is that I would have been filled with rage. I should probably figure out a response because it will probably happen someday. I think I would not have done it. But I don't know how I would have gotten away. The problem with it is that I look like an asshole either way. If I do it, I hate every second of it. And people are like "what is this guy's problem?" If I don't do it, I look like a poor sport. But since I've done it at one wedding and felt the awfulness of that, I think my next move is to try just standing there and saying stuff like, "I told you guys I wouldn't do it, so I'm not doing it." I think the worst part about doing it is that any Rolling Stones song goes on for at least 3 minutes. At the wedding it happened at, the first 30 seconds or so were fine, but then there's just that painful, awful 2.5 minutes where everyone is staring at you and nobody is happy. Oh God. I may have to never go to a wedding again.

1 comment:

Arnie said...

Steve: [via e-mail] I can't emphasize enough how much I will hate the person who pimps me into this. <--- Definitely quote this last sentence.